June 2011
2 posts
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WatchShit Burger
Artificial meat from human feces.
And that just can’t be healthy.
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May 2011
14 posts
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WatchGirls Watch Porn, too
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“I went down on my boyfriend one night after drinking. the next morning he goes...”
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WatchWATCH GOOGLE ROAST FACEBOOK AND MYSPACE. AND TWITTER AND EVERYBODY ELSE MAKE FUN OF MYSPACE.
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Case Close.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger: ’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: hey
You: I’m
You: a
Stranger: how’s ur day?
You: oh shit should i begin??? my day was WEIRD
Stranger: why
You: well it’s a long story
You: d oyou really want to here it or no?
Stranger: yes , i want to
You: ok well pull up a chair…
You: here it goes
Stranger: ok
You: well today I worked until 4pm…
You: I got off and planned on seeing my gf at her place
You: I got in my car though and decided I would go to the 7/11 on the way to get something to drink
Stranger: okay
You: big mistake
Stranger: why
You: when I got there I got out of the car and noticed so weird people
You: a couple actually
You: a wigger guy and his slutty girlfriend
You: so I noticed this couple in the 7/11 chatting away LOUDLY talking about how the girl’s father almost got killed the other day
You: apparently someone is out to get her and her family
Stranger: okay
You: so anyway while listening to that interesting conversation I got my drink, payed and started to pay
You: I noticed the couple went outside and was just standing there
You: I started to leave and go to my car when I heard the wigger guy yell, “hey come here for a second”
You: this is were it gets interesting
You: I think he was yelling to someone else of course, I’ve never seen ths guy before
You: so I just start walking away
You: but he yells again, this time I look back and he waves me towards him
Stranger: qoq
Stranger: wow
You: I was like…..wtf……but i decided to see what he wanted
You: so I went over there and the dude says, “hey man, you got a car right?? can you give me and my girl here a ride?”
You: of course I said no
You: I start walking away but the guy is persistent
Stranger: u should say no!
You: he’s like, “come on man”
You: I just igonre him…
You: but I’m getting into my car when he comes from behind me and starts to talk to me more
You: he says, “i’m not stupid you know”
You: “I know who you are”
You: I was confused
You: I told him I’ve never seen him before…
You: He says, “yeah fucking right, you’re Brian, Joey’s brother. I know who you are.”
You: huuh???
You: I do not have a brother and my name is definitely not brian
Stranger: and
You: I decide these people are not worth my time so I decide to get into my car
You: but the wigger dude trys and punch me! no lie!
You: I dodge his weak as puch and puch him square in the nose/mouth
You: punch*\
You: I swear to god… that guys noce EXPLODED with blood
You: I hit that sucker hard
You: anyway
You: he started to run around crying about what I did to him…. he was holding is nose, his hands were full of blood
Stranger: wow
You: then I realized what his gf was doing…..she was on her phone, calling the cops
You: I got kinda nervous
You: I looked down and saw loose teeth on the ground….omg
You: I decided to leave, this was too much
You: I went back to my house, I decided not to go see my gf
You: when I got home my mom was there
You: she could see something was wrong….so she asked what was wrong..
You: so I told her…
You: she got kinda upset, she was confused on why I left the scene, she said it was self defense. I shouldn’t have anything to worry about
You: she also said this…
You: you’re moving with auntie and uncle in bel-air!!
You: I whistled for a cab
You: and when it come near
Stranger: um
You: the license plates said fresh and there was dice in the mirror
You: if anything
You: I’d say this cab was rare
You: But I thought forget it
You: Yo homes to Bel-Air!!!!!!
You: I pulled up to the house around 7 or 8
You: and yelled to the cabbie
You: “yo homes, smell ya later”
You: I looked at my kingdom
You: I was finally there
You: to sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air
You: END
Stranger: thanks for sharing
You: you like it?
Stranger: yes
You: cool, so how was your day?
Stranger: nothing special
Stranger: lol
You: ohreally
You: well you could just make up an outragous story and call it your day
You: are you chinese?
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: how do u know
You: case closed
You have disconnected.
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Anonymous asked: Dear Fucker, I know about all of your secrets.
Sincerely, Yo Mama
Sincerely, Yo Mama
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Shit My Students Write: In conclusion, TMI. →
Like I said in the introduction, Planned Parenthood has affected me directly. Knowing from doctors telling me in the past and friends encouraging me, I knew after I lost my virginity I should go in for an annual. I scheduled at the campus clinic and the test results came back fine and I went on with my life. I broke it off with the guy I was seeing and proceeded to sleep around with a few guys....
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April 2011
1 post
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crystalshoener asked: Thank you for following me! :D
March 2011
26 posts
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Steve Jobs is the Brother of Homer Simpsons...
Who would of thought?
Here’s a weird fun fact for you on a slow news Tuesday: there’s a very real familial link between Apple CEO Steve Jobs and TV’s Homer Simpson. Here’s how.
As some of you may know, Steve Jobs was put up for adoption as an infant. What you may not know is that Steve Jobs’ birth parents are Joanne Carole Schieble and Abdulfattah Jandali, who put him up for adoption because...
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Today is someone's birthday!
dcwomenkickingass:
Can you guess?
It’s a DC woman. And she kicks ass.
She’s appeared in television, movies and animation.
She’s had a lot of costumes.
She’s had her own comic book. Twice.
She’s one of my favorites.
Did you guess?
Read More
Time to tell my girlfriend to get out her Costume tonight.
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“I’m Bi-Winning”
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Definition: Winning on the ultimate level
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The fun begins.
My first post :]
